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I used to be that person that was always there whenever ANYONE needed me. I was the person everyone could count on.
I’ve been the person to front people money again and again who I knew probably wouldn’t pay me back.
I’ve gone and picked people up in the middle of the night who probably wouldn’t have done the same for me.
I’ve been a listening ear to people who would never just sit and listen to me when I just needed to vent.
Eventually, I had to put an end to being the person that everyone went to because it was exhausting.
Not only was it taking a toll on my mental health, but I would find myself stressing out about these people and their problems while none of them even thought about the toll their problems were taking on me.
I had to learn to say no. I had to learn that it is not my job to be the fixer of everyone else’s problems.
I had to learn that while yes, sometimes it is nice to help others, it can become a toxic cycle when it’s one-sided. It also becomes toxic when other people’s problems consume you to the point where you’re ignoring all of your own needs and problems.
When I stopped being that person, I lost a lot of “friends” that I constantly helped out.
But, it was honestly a weight lifted off of my shoulder. Now I put my own needs first because I realize how important it is to be the person I was to all of those people to myself. I need to be there for myself because me and my problems matter too.
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