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How do you deal with rejection?

I have been looking at some of the statistics of homeless LGBT youth in the United States and I must admit that I find them astonishing.
Of the 1.6 million homeless youth in America, 40% identify as LGBT. LGBT homeless youth commit suicide at 62% compared to heterosexual homeless youth at 29%.
Not everyone who has been rejected by their family may eventually become homeless however, some of us may be lucky enough to find a friend or family member who we can trust and who is willing to accept us.
But the reality of leaving home without a place to stay is still a hard one.
For me, that’s how I started out…
One of the toughest questions, I have had to ask myself is, ‘Where am I going to sleep tonight?’
First there is the shame, then the guilt, then depression, then confusion, then loneliness and then the suicidal thoughts kick in.
Dealing with family rejection can be really frustrating and the thought of starting over can be overwhelming.
Nonetheless, I think that everyone deals with rejection in a different way.
Like I deal with every other problem, I write about it.
I write about the distance that has been created between me and my mother
… And the things I may never be able to do with my brother again.
But I also encourage myself. I choose to think that things will eventually change and I will be able to confront my fears and acknowledge that it is not my fault.
Often times however, many people will not be able to easily adopt my coping skills… situations vary; and one may opt for options like doing drugs or even committing suicide.
There are my times in my past when I thought ‘enough is enough’ and I just want do the things that will make it better but without a second thought I would probably not be here today.
Sometimes it requires that we forgive the people who hurt us and develop the ambition needed to make our lives better. That way we can prove to the people who rejected us, that despite it all, our lives have value and that way, we can also help to reduce the number of homeless youth and not be a statistic.

“Never forget what you are, for surely the world will not.
Make it your strength, for then it can never be your weakness.
Armor yourself in it, and it will never be used to hurt you.”

8 Replies to “How do you deal with rejection?”

  1. RaiC says:

    & that’s the most positive way to look at it Kevin! Not every person in this world will understand you, me or the person in the other room. It’s not up to them to be able to control who we are or what we become… and whether or not they accept or reject us doesn’t really matter. People have their own reasons for the things they choose to do and we cannot always try to understand them. You’re so right…. we just have to do what makes us better and find value in ourselves!

  2. Kevin A. says:

    That’s right Rai… perseverance is key

  3. Michael says:

    Thanks for sharing Kevin. I admire how honest you always are with your posts. It inspires me to not be afraid to really share.

  4. Kevin A. says:

    I’m really happy that you can relate Michael. I owe a lot to the many brave people who have come forward over the years to tell their truth. I can draw from a list of amazing role models who I look up to everyday.

  5. VRuiz says:

    THIS is why i visit this forum.. there’s truth and experiences like this that keep me intrigued. I loved this and I appreciate your bravery and honesty. My reality is very similar to this.. many of my friends and family have gone through this very point in their life and its amazing to see how all of them (and you) have grown and have developed a certain sense of courage and confidence that is truly admired. It’s people like you that make the fight so worth it. To know that you’ve been there and to know that there is a way up and out of darkness… gives hope. I’ll def be sharing this with my cousin, she needs to read this. Thanks Kevin!

  6. Kevin A. says:

    Awesome Vee… its always a pleasure connecting with positive and like minded people.

  7. Jamie0715 says:

    I think that you should sit down and have a serious conversation with your parents because obviously you have to change something that you do to go back to your parents house.

  8. Kevin A. says:

    I wish I could Jamie… maybe some day, who knows?

    I am still able to have a conversation with my mother but not on the topic of ‘coming out’ or admitting that I am gay.
    My father is a complete contrast, he wants nothing to do with gay people so a conversation with him would be a dream come true.

    Maybe from an unlikely place but I believe in the words of Alexander Graham Bell.
    “A man, as a general rule, owes very little to what he is born with ? a man is what he makes himself.”

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