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Bullies

Have you ever been bullied? I have. Many times over my 23 years of life; and the bullying still continues to this very day. I am being bullied by a guy that lives in my home. I live in a group home so I technically cannot avoid this person, but I can try to get away from him by going to the school I attend and using the library as a sanctuary for when I need to escape from this person during the day when the school and the library is open. But on weekends I cannot just simply avoid him, so I just tend to stay in my room pretty much all the time because he upsets me all the time. I even cried this morning, the morning of August 12, 2015. It was so bad that I could not attend my vocational program that pays me some money for attending. I have decide that I will attend while he around and that I will not want to be around him any more. So, as I am writing this post, I want to know if any of you have been bullied and how it felt when you have and what you have done to try fix or find a way to change what you did during you week to avoid the bully? Please reply with your answers. It would help me and make me feel better if I knew that there others out there that had the same feelings that I did. Thank you.


5 Replies to “Bullies”

  1. VRuiz says:

    Hey, i am so sorry that you’re going through such a rough time. Have you tried talking to some of the staff at your group home? They might be able to help mediate the issue. This happened to me when I lived in a group home, and I was able to make the situation better / less interfering with my life by asking some of the staff for help.

  2. VRuiz says:

    Hey Sundancer! Im so sorry that you have to deal with that but I am happy that you came here to share that. You are not alone in dealing with this and I am here for you.

    Yes, I have been bullied and remember not being able to talk about it at all. It was when I was younger. I was new to the neighborhood and clearly a target. I felt as if no one even gave me a chance to show them who I was, so I felt like crap. I cried a lot too and tried to deal with it on my own by avoiding the older guys and girls bullying me, so I really understand how you feel and you have every right to feel that way. I would try to go to my family member’s homes, stay involved with sports, and write a lot. I kept a journal and it helped me to talk about things. I always had mock conversations with myself that would help me to talk to people about why they messed with me and things like that. It really helped me in the end when I did become brave enough to speak my mind.

    I was really afraid to stand up for myself at first because I was so shy and I did not like confrontation but I knew that in order for things to change, I had to either get some help about it or stand up to the bullying. My cousins started to be around more and I began to listen and watch how they carried themselves and admired how tough they were. They always told me not to be afraid or intimidated by anyone and reminded me that bullies usually have their own personal issues and need some support too, so I took that into consideration. It made the process of standing up for myself more positive and meaningful.

    I know its easier said than done, but Izzy has a great suggestion to speak to the staff in the home. Since he has been bullying you and you can barely avoid him, you should try talking to someone so that you do not have to deal with him directly if he is constantly treating you this way. It’s truly unfair to you, its def not okay that you have to change your routine, miss out on things and hide away.

    Stay positive and keep your head held high. If you feel like you need to talk to someone, call the Crisis Support line 1 800 273 8255 or Text “CTL” to 741741. A couple of my friends called to speak about a few things that they were dealing with and they were able to get help. You are a great person and I know that you do not deserve to be mistreated.

  3. Sundancer2015 says:

    Thank you all for your posts and keep them coming. To reply to those who have posted posted already, I too write in a personal journal about my feelings and about what I think about my life. I also talk to myself, even though I tell myself, and even pretend, that I talking to an actual person. I have done this for years and I used to have group of imaginary friends that I eventually ended up creating a whole world that I prentended was an escape world for myself and had millions of inhabitants. It was an imaginary earth with its own solar system and universe. I still continue that practice today, but it is now with just one person, and the imaginary world and universe has changed. I now believe that I was someone that has had lived another life and has been given a second chance, but her friends and family from that past life have been trying to find her. I feel that because of my personality, it makes me a target of bullying, but more than that, being in a group home with people that you cannot choose who live with, also makes you a target of bullying. I have doors slammed in my face when I want to talk to the group home staff that are in the group home’s office. I cry most times when this happens. I want to thank you for your posts because you are making feel good, but also you are showing that I am not the only one who goes this frightening scary put down of weak people and I am happy that you are brave enough to tell. Please keep the posts coming as I will never judge you. I will reply with my own feelings and what happens to myself. No judgements. Just open door, free will talk.

  4. VRuiz says:

    Well, in terms of trying to talk to the group home staff and having them slam doors in your face, you could always call Connecticut Legal Rights Project at 877-402-2299. They can help you advocate for yourself if you feel like you aren’t being heard by your group home staff. Let me know if that helps.

  5. VRuiz says:

    You’re imagination is out of this world! I love it! You have such a creative mind and that is so special. I think you have a natural talent and you should look into blogging and even writing books! I would def read them. I know I’m always pretending to talk to “people” because it helps me to prepare for the interaction. It’s def a skill of mine, looks like we have a lot in common :).

    I completely believe in people coming back to this world as other people! I even think they come back as animals as well! I had a dog at one point who acted entirely too much like a human & my friend mentioned that perhaps he was someone who was given a second chance at life. Ever since then, I really think about that.

    I like your personality (from what I can make of it through convo). Don’t change for anyone. Sometimes I feel like everyone isn’t necessarily meant to be the best of friends.. People are all so different and there is a match for everyone ya know. So def dont blame yourself or your personality for the reason you’re being bullied. You are unique and clearly a really great person.

    The door slamming is completely out of line. Do you have anyone that you can reach out to? Perhaps someone you’re comfortable with speaking to?
    I know for sure that I would speak up against what’s going on there, that’s not fair to you or anyone else that this is happening to. Stay strong and stay positive.

    Thank you for staying so open and non judgmental!


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