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Updating My Wardrobe

Due to some unfortunate circumstances that I’d rather not talk about here, I had to get rid of almost all of my clothes in my wardrobe last year. The awful thing was, I couldn’t afford to buy myself new clothes. It was a horrible feeling. I just felt so defeated.

Thankfully though, I had friends step in to help me to replace the clothes I had lost. One of my best friends from high school who moved across the country to Washington mailed me clothes she didn’t wear anymore. My other friend from middle school told people in her church about my situation and so many of them donated clothes and shoes to me. My cousin gave me a couple bags of clothes. Dominique, the old project assistant for TurningPointCT let me go through clothes she was giving away. I was really grateful for all of them.

I’ve been poor for years, so getting used clothes from others didn’t bother me. I’ve been taking hand me downs from people for years and they made up pretty much my entire wardrobe. In fact, I hadn’t REALLY shopped for clothes for myself in years aside from something here and there from Walmart (don’t judge, the clothes are affordable and actually really cute). My clothes were from people I knew or from the local Buy Nothing Group.

Getting New Clothes

Last year, I got a bonus of sorts from my job and I finally had a bit of disposable income to buy myself some clothes. First on my list was to get myself some jeans that ACTUALLY fit me (something I hadn’t had in years). It had been so long since I went jean shopping that I genuinely had no idea what size I needed. I quickly realized I’m still very much between sizes in some styles and brands.

When I finally found out my size, there was definitely a part of me that was insecure. But then I reminded myself they’ve been doing weird things with jeans sizes for years. After finding the size, I had to figure out what style of jeans I liked and felt comfortable in. As someone who struggles a lot with their body image, it was an agonizing couple of hours. I usually just wear black leggings everyday because it’s what I’m comfortable in.

Figuring Out My Style

While shopping, I tried things I wouldn’t typically wear like straight leg and mom jeans. I found some I liked and I bought them. But, I also got some skinny jeans, aka ole reliable. It’s been quite the experience trying to figure out my style after wearing other people’s hand me downs for years and just working with what I had.

I spent a lot of time last year trying to figure out my style and putting together outfits that I felt good in. I started to follow a lot of influencers who gave outfit ideas. Most of the people I followed have a similar body type to me because I wanted to feel confident, but I just didn’t know how to dress my body because I spent years hiding it in black leggings and oversized tops. After following some of the “mid size” clothing influencers, I realized my story is not that uncommon. I’m glad there are people on the internet to help me out with outfit ideas.

I slowly started to build a wardrobe with clothes I loved. I wish I could say that having clothes I love is enough to make me feel confident. But, I still have days where I’m changing five times and just wearing one of my tried and true outfits I know I’m comfortable in. Right now if I’m going out I have one dress I go for if it’s warm enough, a pair of straight leg pants with a white body suit, or leggings and a quarter zip or hoodie.

The other problem I have is having clothes I bought that I loved in the dressing room, but hate on me when I get home. I’ll put them on and think about wearing them in public, but I can’t get myself to wear them. My boyfriend will tell me I look fine, but when I look in the mirror everything just looks wrong and I’ll hate how the clothes look on me (specifically fitted tops).

Final Thoughts on Updating My Wardrobe

I’m still very much figuring it out, and some days I’m braver and more confident than others when it comes to my clothes. But, cheers to the progress I have made so far. If I ever have money again, I’d like to improve my wardrobe even more to have more options because I definitely have comfort outfits that I wear over and over to everything lol.

-Kaliey