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Throughout my earlier school years, I always struggled with extreme anxiety and had trouble being in large groups of people. I always felt awkward in situations that I didn’t really know anyone, and it made it hard especially during my high school years. I never got the chance to go to prom, to any parties besides family gatherings or church events, and I felt like if I had been more adjusted and in control of who I was during that time period, those years of my life would have been more stable. I also found that I was more often than not going in and out of inpatient hospitals, so it was hard to maintain relationships with friends. I am so happy that I have been able to get to a point in my recovery journey that I am attending school and am able to have relationships that I know are meaningful. I wouldn’t have been able to get to this step if I didn’t have belief in myself, or if had never learned to become comfortable in some social situations. At times I guess we just have to go through some discomfort in order to proceed to the good stuff. I am now able to confidently progress in the social aspects of my life, and I am glad it has happened now that I am ready for it than having had it happen earlier on when I probably wasn’t equipped to handle and maintain relationships. 🙂
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This is great to hear Luz. Pressure makes diamonds…so those uncomfortable or even awkward situations make for great learning experiences. School is just one of those places that are extremely difficulty to really gauge. There’s so much going on but so little time to really figure it all out at once. I really can relate with the anxiety and social gatherings… I think I deal with that more in my adulthood than I have before. I find it so hard sometimes to jump into things, always thinking that someone is judging me. But then i realize that I am who I am, and it’s take it or leave it ya know. Some people love it some dont, and thats ok.
I feel inspired by your post Luz. Its really nice to hear about the strides that you have made. I beleive you should be proud of yourself.
Social anxiety affects the best of us but taking on the opportunity to be yourself and learning to be comfortable with your suroundings is a great place to start. Thumps up to that.
Thanks guys 🙂
Sometimes things don’t happen at certain times because they aren’t supposed to, but when they eventually do, they are so much more worth it! 🙂
I totally agree with what kev and Vee are saying.. you should be really proud of yourself.. it’s really inspiring! I think I enjoy my alone time at school now, where in high school I hated having to be alone or sit alone
Hi Luz,
I can totally relate to a lot of your experiences. I can feel your longing and desire to have the best life possible. I know you are making great progress and strides. I know that there are periods of time where I don’t see friends as often as I should, but the bottom line is that work and school are priorities that come first. I know that in time I will be more available to them.
I also find now that I have done some inner work, I can attract and maintain the right friendships, as you said as well Luz. Hope you enjoyed your weekend!