Media Room

International Overdose Awareness Day 2022

Each year on August 31st, communities rally together to remember their loved ones who have died due to an overdose. This year, I’ll be celebrating 7 years in recovery from opiates. As grateful as I am to have not lost my life from drugs, my heart aches for those that have. I try my hardest to not feel survivors guilt, but it seems to come every year, especially on this day.

How could I possibly think of my recovery when my friends aren’t alongside with me anymore? To be honest, when I hear the raw stories of families grieving, it helps my recovery. I vividly remember and picture them during those moments that I feel so vulnerable to relapsing. So if you’re reading this, and you speak openly about your grief, I promise that it does help people stay in recovery.

Survivors guilt is real. This is what I hear in my head on International Overdose Awareness Day:
-“my friends should’ve been here too”
-“what makes me the lucky one?”
-“I don’t deserve this while others are suffering”
-“some of those friends that died was because they first used with me”
-“it’s my fault”
-“I could have done more”

It’s a constant tape that plays in my mind while I attend these events. How can I comfort the mother of a son I adored, knowing that we used together? How could I share my recovery story while all of these people are grieving?

Honestly, I don’t have answers. I call when called upon and my mission is to bring hope to someone still struggling. My message is of healing and resiliency, which I share with the intention of helping someone else. Although I grieve alongside so many others, I feel as if any strength that I have is from my friend’s who no longer have their voice. This day of recognition is one day out of 365 that I think of them, and I’m grateful to carry their memories with me.