24/7 Hotlines: Call or text 988 or text 741741
Hi everyone!
What are some traits you would like in a best friend or lover? We all have expectations on how we want them to be. Name at least three!
TurningPointCT.org was developed by young people in Connecticut who are in recovery from mental health and substance use issues. We know what it’s like to feel alone, stressed, worried, sad, and angry. We’ve lived through the ups and downs of self-harm, drugs and alcohol, and the struggle to find help.
Learn More »
© 2024 TurningPointCT.org. All Rights Reserved.
Hey Carl!
I fell in love with my best friend, so he has traits I want in both a friend and lover lol
For me, for a significant other, I need someone who…
1. Loves the Lord and puts Him first. — I’m dedicated in my faith and although I don’t judge anyone for their beliefs, I need someone who is going to share my beliefs because we are building something together. We may not agree with everything in life, but this is a core fundamental. I want to be able to go to church with my significant other, pray with them, read the Bible, etc. If I’m stuck on something, I want to be able to go to him for answers too. Also, I want my significant other to be able to guide me with God’s love, light, and instruction. I’m really blessed to have someone now who loves me because he knows how precious I am to the Lord. Also, having the Christ-like qualities makes the relationship extra special 🙂
2. Humor !! — He’s GOT to be funny! I love to laugh, I’m really silly and outgoing, so I need someone who will laugh with me and not take life so seriously. That monotone personality, I just can’t for relationships. My guy now is really funny and reminds me to laugh at myself which is even better 🙂
3. Family, Friends, Babies, & Pets — If someone wants to be with me, they need to realize that there are other people that come with me. My family is my biggest support system, so I love to have someone who can respect them .. and he better be ready for Game Night. My friends are a big part of my life, so I definitely need someone who’s going to understand that Girls Night is a thing. Babies… He’s gotta love kids, point blank. Pets… I have my son and daughter, my cats, that are my heart. If they can’t love my animal, they definitely don’t have room in my heart or life!
4. My past is my past — Lastly, I need someone who is going to truly comprehend the word and everything that goes in it, “PAST”. My past is NOT pretty and I don’t really believe people when they say, “your past is your past, I don’t care” .. because I feel like people pick and choose what past times they can accept or not. Accepting is one thing, I don’t expect them to embrace it, but they can do more than just accept, they can NOT JUDGE!! I understand that once he finds out about the not-so-attractive things I’ve done, he might make a face, but I sure hope he can be understanding and focus more of where I am now. I’m really blessed to have someone who truly doesn’t judge my past and sees the beauty of the testimonies that have come out of it.
Along with Ally, I too fell in love with my best friend! I have never been happier with a human being.
I have a list of qualities I look for in a partner, and I am lucky enough to have found a man who exceeds those points on my list.
The qualities I look for in a significant other:
-He is kind and gentle. His heart is pure and full of love.
-He loves me for all that I am; he cares for me regardless of the baggage that I have.
-He is good to his family, his mother especially.
-He has goals and dreams of his own, in addition to the ones we have together.
-He makes me laugh; laughter is my favorite thing!
-He is good to MY family.
-He loves my fur baby!
-He is respectful and supportive of all of my puzzle pieces.
Most of these qualities I also look for in a friend! I am lucky to have friends that have many of these same qualities.
Hi Carl and Ally,
I think this is an awesome topic. I agree a lot with what Ally posted, but I wanted to add to the conversation. I think it is important for a friend/lover to be self aware. The ability to take a step back and apologize or to rethink how they operate.
I definitely (especially when I was younger) was not self aware and I probably came across as judgmental or immature. I needed to become aware of how I was around people, so I can adapt to what a friend would need from me at that time.
I would also add Intelligence – not in a conceited, you have to be a genius way (because I am sure am not) :0
But in that deep way where you can have real conversations and be able to dig deeper into experiences, thoughts and feelings.
Hey Carl,
I feel like for my best friends, they would need to be:
-Whole heatedly accepting
-Forgiving
-Have a sense of humor
-Like my dry jokes
-Be accepting of the intense amount of memes I will tag them in on Facebook
-Be willing to listen as well not only just reply
-Not care about my past
-Be trustworthy
-Be respectful
-Know how to tell met things in my face when I need to hear them/be blunt
In a significant other, I would want these traits:
-Someone respectful
-Someone loyal
-Someone trustworthy
-Someone who does not judge my past
-Has a sense of humor
-Is independent
-Is goal oriented and is focused on moving forward in life
-Prefer someone with an interest in sports
-Humble
-Family oriented
I would like both my friend and my partner to reflect the same qualities that I posses.
-Caring
-Nurturing
-Honest
-Loyal
-Trustworthy
-Kind
-Genuine
-Generous
-Joyful
-Determined
-Beautiful (inside and outside)
-Forgiving
-Smart
-Peaceful
The list could go on and on, I feel like these are all qualities that we all possess sometimes life events can stop us from openly expressing them. If we all manage our stress and work through problems that we go through then we would be able to be our best selves and we can freely display all of our qualities.