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Our Stories

MW’s Story on her struggle with suicidal thoughts, Age: 16

What have you struggled with? When did it become too much?

I have struggled with depression anxiety and suicidal thoughts since I was 12 years old

What kind of support did you get at first? Did it work?

I tried talking to friends and adult about my depression and anxiety, but I was always told that I was being pessimistic or that I was just complaining rather than fixing what I needed to.

Were there any turning points where things really started to change for the better?

After four years of losing family member and friends and young relationships I had enough. It only took one night where I felt alone and no one was there to set me off. I attempted suicide right before I finished the 11th grade. After my attempt I was admitted to a mental hospital under a 201. I spent 11 days there talking through my issues and meeting new people.

What’s your life like now? What have you been able to accomplish, and what are you working towards?

I still struggle with depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts even after almost a month since my discharge, but I see life differently. I will never be able to run from my mental illness. I may not always want to be here and I may shut down sometimes from sadness, but in the hospital I truly saw my blessings. Every few days I get a letter from a girl I met in the hospital that was 13 and I talk to her about her problems since I can’t talk to her over the phone. Being told that my letters make a person happy and that my presence made their stay a little more comfortable is the reason I live. Those compliments are the reason I keep going when I feel like my life is going backwards.

What would you say to people who are having a tough time? What’s helped you that you wish you had known earlier

Always talk about your issues. If people do not want to hear them find someone that does. It could be a therapist, teacher, parent, sibling, friend. Someone will always care even when we think that no one does. Also, never get attached to people. People will come and go from your life and you have absolutely no control over it. Sometimes you have nothing to do with it. Never let people or things cause you to question your worth.