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Insecurity

Ever have days where you feel insecure about yourself? What helps you to get out of this mode? What helps you to motivate yourself and get your self-esteem back?


18 Replies to “Insecurity”

  1. amber says:

    i pamper myself a little bit… relax a little or dress up for no reason. or i do something i know i’m good at, so that i can succeed at something and then feel a little better about myself.

  2. Nana says:

    This happens to me a lot. When the insecurity initially strikes, it can be quite overwhelming and anxiety-inducing. My initial instinct is always to shut down; but when I recognize that feeling, I try to take a step back and look at the bigger picture. I get some quiet time to myself to reflect on what I’m good at and often times, I share my insecurities with a close friend who I can trust. Sharing your self-doubt with a trusted friend can be a great way to prevent the insecurities from growing so large and out of control.

  3. Kaitlin says:

    I for sure deal with this, too, whether it’s just a fleeting thought or an entire day or week where I just feel really “blah” about myself. Like Nana said, I often will confide in a friend and that does tend to keep the insecurities from festering or becoming a bigger problem. It’s really nice to have someone else help me squash those thoughts and affirm all the great things about me. If no one else is around, I’ll talk up myself, going so far as making a list of the things I like about myself, or reflecting on the things I’ve achieved or that I’m working on that I’m really proud of. I think I’ll always battle my insecurities and that they’ll always pop up from time to time, but I try to remember that the really intense feelings of insecurity don’t last forever as long as I do take the proper steps to forget about them or distract myself from them. It can often take a bunch of different approaches to finally shake off these feelings–anything from doing something refreshing like taking a shower (or even just taking a nap–those can do wonders sometimes!!), something active like going for a run or some other activity I like, or something reflective or therapeutic like drawing or writing.

  4. Laurat says:

    I actually feel like this quite often, but I have found ways to avoid getting down in the dumps about my insecurities. Sometimes just taking part in healthy practices like eating healthier and going for runs or to the gym helps. I make sure to express how I feel with a close friend and she tends to keep me accountable by coming with me and doing the things with me. I have also wrote in my journal a list of negatives about myself and then crossed it out and wrote a positve that I love about myself next to it. Sometimes you need to take a second and realize how wonderful and beautiful you really are 🙂

  5. Laurat says:

    I actually feel like this quite often, but I have found ways to avoid getting down in the dumps about my insecurities. Sometimes just taking part in healthy practices like eating healthier and going for runs or to the gym helps. I make sure to express how I feel with a close friend and she tends to keep me accountable by coming with me and doing the things with me. I have also wrote in my journal a list of negatives about myself and then crossed it out and wrote a positve that I love about myself next to it. Sometimes you need to take a second and realize how wonderful and beautiful you really are 🙂

  6. Tochi says:

    I feel this way more often than I like admitting. In school, outside of it, everywhere. Everything that’s already been said has proven helpful for me. Sometimes, I do the things that give me comfort, like reading, for instance. It’s a way for me to be reminded that there are bigger things out there than my insecurity. There are pretty things out there that I can sit back and admire.

    I like Amber’s suggestion too. Sometimes, all it takes for me to feel better is to put on a tie. For no reason whatsoever. 🙂

  7. lkruth says:

    My mom always told me that as I got older insecurities would go away. I don’t think this is true; I think they just change form. However I have learned ways of managing insecurities so I can acknowledge them and get on with life. When I’m feeling insecure about my work, I plan for a few long work days so that I can accomplish more and feel on-track again. When I’m feeling insecure within a friendship, I re-evaluate what it is about the friendship that is playing on my insecurities. I also look at whether this friend is one that’s really beneficial to have deeply within my life or one that adds more toxicity than joy. If I decide to maintain the friendship, I’ll have a blunt discussion with the friend about why I sometimes feel crappy around them and what they could do differently to help avoid putting me in that position. And if I’m just generally feeling insecure, I put on an awesome pair of high heels or some red lipstick.

  8. impossibleproject says:

    These are some great suggestions. I think that not talking about makes it a whole lot worse! But when I talk to a friend about it– I immediately remember that everyone feels insecure– even Brad Pitt, probably. Well maybe not as often as some of us– but I bet he still has days where he feels insecure, too! Being aware of where our minds can go sometimes can help us to disengage from thoughts like this– or at least not let them overpower us!

  9. Laurat says:

    I completely agree with you everyone of all shapes and sizes gets insecure sometimes! Embrace your faults because everyone is imperfect 🙂

  10. jgreens2015 says:

    Yes I do. What helps me is to move a muscle and change a thought. Whether it is going to the gym, starting a new project at work, or calling my support network and trying to help others, staying busy and doing something meaningful is the most helpful thing I can do.

  11. taaaylaaaa says:

    I definitely feel insecure more often than I would like to admit. People of all shape, size and gender feel insecure at one point or another. You just have to develop your own coping skills so that you don’t allow insecurities to take control over your mind and body. When a feeling of insecurity strikes have something or someone to go to! I like to talk about it with a friend or someone I am comfortable talking to. Try doing something you love.This will boost your confidence and rid of that feeling of anxiety. Like Amber said, pamper yourself! Dress up or just do something nice for yourself.

  12. maria1234 says:

    Yes. Sometimes I feel like I will never achieve the goals I have set for myself and it is frustrating, demotivating, and saddening. I usually tell my friends or family when I am feeling this way and they are always able to make me see all the things I have already accomplished and remind me that sometimes it takes time to achieve new goals and that patience is the key. To motivate myself I also remind myself of the good things I have done and achieved in my life and try to be grateful for how far I have already come.

  13. samdc says:

    I have plenty of days where I feel insecure and down on myself. One thing I try to do is remember how far I have come and the accomplishments I have under my belt. I try to practice compassion towards myself as I do towards others. I try to think of it this way, if I were someone else what would I say to myself? Would I say such harsh things to others?

  14. wisdom2015 says:

    I like to save notes from people I love–close friends and family, either emails or letters–and read these notes when I feel down. It’s a way of remembering life is so much bigger than any particular moment. I also like to write notes to people–telling them how much they mean to me–so that they can have these notes, too, to help them in moments of need. Writing someone a letter of love and gratitude also gets me out of myself in a way that gets me in motion again, saves me from feelings of self-loathing.

  15. hollandryan51 says:

    I used to feel insecure almost everyday. Especially when meeting new people. Then one day I was listening to pandora one day bc I use it to deal with the anxiety I sometimes get and I came across a song by the band, Bastille called “Flaws”. The song was about exhuming all your flaws and owning them and being proud of them, saying that these flaws make us who we are and with out them we wouldn’t be us. This song gave me a new found strength inside to instead hiding and feeling insecure about myself instead just lay them out on the table and I listen to the song every day to remind myself that my flaws are what make me…. me so there is no reason to be afraid and insecure about them because they make me unique in my own. Ps if anyone wants to listen to the song here is the YouTube link Flaws By: Bastille”>https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=WDoU-gE2AXA

  16. ewriter2015 says:

    I believe that everyone, regardless of perceived talent, success and beauty falls victim to times of self-doubt and nagging insecurity. We live in a society that is constantly creating visual representations of their life as “ideal” and putting them out there on platforms to judge and be judged – with social media playing such a heavy role in our daily lives, the stress to perfect is pervasive. The best strategies I have found as an adult to combat these moments of insecurity have begun with unplugging, getting away from all screen media is key. Refocusing time and energy on things that I enjoy, that bring fulfillment and get me out of my comfort zone are always huge boosts to self esteem. Teaching yoga is a way that I am able to share something that I am skilled at to bring comfort and happiness to others and the joy that it brings me is immense. Volunteering with organizations that do work you’re passionate about is another great way to feel good in a much deeper sense of finding purpose and connecting with like-minded people. Getting away from screens and spending time with humans is the way to go when you’re feeling low.

  17. RaiC says:

    I think this happens just about everyday. I see something or someone and revert back to feeling insecure about things that I know I shouldn’t. I think about all the great things about myself and the qualities that everyone seems to love. Usually reach out to a friend and just spark some convo, figure out a way to remind myself that things could always be worse ya know. Once i remember how thankful I am for even having the opportunity to have whatever it is I’m insecure about, things start to lighten up.

    It’s all something in our heads and to defeat it, you have to think harder, smarter and be much more positive.

  18. sunshine says:

    I have always had very low self-esteem. I don’t see myself the way that others see me. I’m really good at putting myself down and making myself feel worse by saying things like I’m no good and I’m stupid or I’m ugly. A few years ago, someone suggested that when I wake up in the morning that I look in the mirror and say, “You’re beautiful and you’ve got it going on.” I try to do this as often as I remember to. I also try to be good to myself when I make mistakes or fail at a task. When I do something well, I am sure to congratulate myself and I acknowledge what I’ve done. I think that it is important to give yourself credit for the good things that you do, but it is also important to acknowledge that mistakes are okay and you can learn from them.


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