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So I’m going on vacation next week and I’m excited. But part of me is really nervous and feeling that insecure feeling in the pit of my stomach. I get so inside my head about how everyone looks better than me and all those shitty thoughts. Comparing is so easy but I don’t want to let it ruin my vacation. We go to Montauk every summer and I really love it there; which I know is what I should really be focusing on. I want to change my outlook but I don’t know where to start. Any ideas?
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Hi Sam.
I can really relate to how you are feeling right now. I know it must be so difficult to be uncomfortable with body image/appearance. I still struggle with this myself. (I struggled for over 12 years with cystic acne and had family with serious eating disorders/body image issues, which led me to work as a makeup artist and esthetician for many years.) I can sometimes feel like people are staring at me or judging me,etc.
Something that has personally helped me is to start with one things about you that you DO like. Keep adding to those list of qualities. Another thing to keep in mind is most people are too worried about their own affairs or situations, and will not be judging or criticizing you. That is our own belief about ourselves and/or others. In fact, there may be plenty of people who wish they could look like you do!
Another thing that you do have control over Sam is self care and love. Be kind to what you tell yourself, and take care of your body. You will be with yourself for a long time. Maybe take small baby steps of acceptance. I did find an empowering link here: http://www.recoveryranch.com/articles/eating-disorders/5-strategies-for-body-acceptance/
And if you are around anyone who does make you feel less than, it is time to change your circle!
I hope you have a great vacation. You inspire me to get out my swimsuit and enjoy the summer! We are all here if you need more support.
Michael 🙂
Totally agree with Michael! You have to look at everything that you do like and love about yourself, that’s so important. I know its easier said than done, but I think it’s def a great place to start. I know when I go to the beach or pool or anything that involves revealing my figure, I am somewhat terrified at first. Im thinking all eyes are on me for all the wrong reasons but then I do remember all the good things about myself and then I remind myself that’s exactly what they may be looking at lol It’s really all in my mind though, everyone is there just to have fun not to judge.
I think we all have the same sense of insecurity when it comes to revealing our bodies in front of strangers… sometimes even friends. It’s like baring it all and showing everything about us that we want to change.. and to be completely honest, I really think no one will have anything to say.
Like Michael said, Im sure they’ll be concerned about their own personal affairs and what not.
So have fun and flaunt it! You look as good as you feel, so turn up and smile, you look amazing!
The beach can be a tough one when it comes to those insecurities. I’ve been at the beach a lot in the last few weeks and the first few times I was in my head. But I tried to focus on enjoying myself. And after a while I realized I wasn’t obsessing about how my body looked. So trying to practice mindfulness was really helpful for me.
I totally get it Sam! I just bought a new bathing suit and when I had to choose the size I threw up a little in my mouth. I have never liked the way I look but I have learned to stop caring what others think. Its my body, not theirs, and its no one else’s business how I treat it. Let them judge, it only means they have too much time on their hands and don’t want to look at themselves. Very few people are totally happy with themselves and its easier to point out someone else’s flaws then work on your own. You only get one body so enjoy it whenever you can. Go to the beach, have fun, and your confidence will scare the haters away!