One of the best pieces of advice I have ever been given was bestowed upon me this morning as I was having a meltdown trying to solve all of my problems all at once.
My sweet and wise friend said to me, “You’ve gotta tackle those problems one step at a time. If we came in here today and the entire office was a mess, we wouldn’t look at it and say, ‘OK, let’s clean the whole thing right now.’ We’d say, ‘Let’s start with the closet. And then move on to the desk.’ You’ve gotta take it step by step.”
Tears are welling up in my eyes as I am writing this, as I am thinking of how RIGHT my sweet friend is. We must take our messes in strides.
I think the best advice I have ever been given is to be myself. I cannot express how hard and how long I struggled to just accept the fact that I am different from a lot of people. I am blunt, I make a mess when I eat, I don’t tend to like girly clothes or things, I can’t contour my make up, I swear like a sailor, I love to burp, I like being rough, but at the same time I struggle being sensitive and overemotional. I was taught I wasn’t supposed to be this way, it was either one way or the other. I just like being me, and maybe being somewhere in between.
The best advice I’ve ever received was “You can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him drink it”. I always looked out for the well being of my loved ones, closest friends, acquaintances and even people I didn’t know so well. I loved to help and I always wanted the best for everyone, for them to succeed. Every time someone came to me with a problem they were having I would invest myself so much that it often felt like I was living the problem as well. It didn’t seem to be so bad at first but then it became very stressful for me. I would do everything I could to help the person out and sometimes they had given up or they didn’t want the help and I would be even more stressed out. So when someone told me that it taught me that you could give someone the idea or tell them what they should do but you cant make them do it. Not only is this advice true but it helps you to stay in the boundary lines of helping and not getting stressed out.
The best advice I’ve ever received was to do my best.
My stepdad had taught me this and I was confused by it at first. He said for me to “simply do my best and let the rest go”.. he also taught me that my best can vary depending on what happened that day. Sometimes, my best is to show up to class early, work, dress up. Yet other days, my best is to throw my hair in a pony tail, show up for class but maybe not participate, and to leave work early.
But I’ve learned to be ok with my best and accept it for what it is. This simple bit of advice has helped me more than I can imagine.
Great advice everyone! I loved reading all of these!
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TurningPointCT.org was developed by young people in Connecticut who are in recovery from mental health and substance use issues. We know what it’s like to feel alone, stressed, worried, sad, and angry. We’ve lived through the ups and downs of self-harm, drugs and alcohol, and the struggle to find help.
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