Social Stuff

Hey guys. My name is Isabel and I’m one of the staff for this website. Outside from being a staff member, I struggle with my own depression and anxiety. So, something really shitty happened last week and I thought I would post about it in here, since that’s what the forum was created for.

While I was on vacation last week, my boyfriend dumped me over video chat. He said that it would be easier to break up “sooner rather than later,” citing the fact that he doesn’t want to be miserable when he goes off to college in the fall. At the time, I was extremely upset, sobbing and everything.

I wish that I didn’t feel so goddamn inadequate and shitty about myself after every break up. It’s like, I break up with someone or they break up with me, and my self-esteem just totally evaporates. I feel totally worthless and unlovable and ugly and fat and annoying, and basically every negative adjective you can think of. I know I shouldn’t base my self-worth on whether or not I’m in a relationship, but that’s really difficult for me.

I think what was most upsetting to me was the fact that he lied about his real reason for breaking up with me, since I found out later that he started seeing someone immediately after we broke up. I wish he had just been honest about it, instead of lying about it. How disrespectful can one person be?