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It’s a strong word that seems to hold a lot of weight these days.
Recently I came out to my grandmother about being Non-binary. Did she take it well? Not really. But I figured I’d been sitting on this secret for over a decade and since I live with her she deserves to know this piece of me. In the end she said, “You know what? I don’t care. You’re still Fallyn. You’re still my granddaughter.” And since then we didn’t really talk about it.
Until recently when she called me a girl over and over in a public diner and… Admittedly, I was getting a little uncomfortable. I don’t identify as a girl but I also didn’t want to start an argument over brunch. So I let it go.
While my grandmother may not fully understand these things, I know my friends support me. They acknowledge who I am and take it for what it is in stride! And I can’t thank them enough for that validation (even though I’d love to be able to help my grandmother process this more I know she won’t bite).
Are there situations when you didn’t feel accepted? Or like an outlier? But you managed to find the silver lining in it anyways? I’d love to know!
I’m so glad that you have the support of your friends and I hope that you’re able to find acceptance from your grandmother how you would like it to be one day.
I can definitely relate to feeling as if I wasn’t accepted. I have felt that way in situations where I was early in recovery and going into certain support groups. I also didn’t feel accepted (and was rejected) by several recovery-related job positions because of the length of recovery that I had.
I’ve been able to find the ‘silver lining’ by remembering who I am in God’s eyes and the people that matter the most to me, like my family and best friends. It’s funny how certain people will support only certain things huh?
I appreciate you sharing this with all of us Fallyn. As for me, I think sometimes when I am out in public and I choose to wear sleeveless tops I feel rejected by others who stare at my old self-harm scars. Some do it with out knowing they do it, and others just stare, hard, not knowing the effect it could potentially have on someone. When things like this happen, I try my best to realize how far I have come and that there is nothing I can do about my scars except maybe continue to cover them up with tattoos. Nevertheless, they are a part of my journey of recovery, and I am being strong in choosing to expose my raw truth to the world around me whether they are able to handle it or not.
TurningPointCT.org was developed by young people in Connecticut who are in recovery from mental health and substance use issues. We know what it’s like to feel alone, stressed, worried, sad, and angry. We’ve lived through the ups and downs of self-harm, drugs and alcohol, and the struggle to find help.
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