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Farewell Post: Doing It Scared

Hi TPCT! It has been a wonderful journey working on this project over the years, and most recently the past 2 years. However, all things come to a closing and it is my time to move onto my next journey! I may not be on the TPCT project, however, I’ll still be there in some capacities. I’ll still be co-facilitating the Alternatives to Suicide support group – aka Alt2Su – and would love to see you!

My New Position

I have accepted a position working with Liberation Programs! I will be working as a counselor at Staples High School in Westport, CT for two days a week. With the other three days of the week, I will be working with the Bridgeport school district, helping implement a Train the Trainer (TOT) mentoring program!! It has been a dream of mine since freshman year of high school to work inside of a high school. I couldn’t believe I was offered this position!

Doing it Scared

As excited as I am to begin this journey, I’m low key scared! School systems, starting a new job, getting to know the agency and crew, and being a part of a new project is so intimidating. Despite the reassurance and encouragement I’ve received, I’m still human. I feel terrified that I’ll mess this up. I’m not sure if it’s a trauma thing or an anxiety thing, but I’m nervous. I worry about my performance not being good enough. That I’ll have a PTSD flare-up and get fired. I worry that I won’t “look the part”. That people may judge my counseling style.

Understanding Myself & My Feelings

I’ve learned that trying to eliminate the fear is never successful. I may be able to relieve my anxiety a bit, but it will still exist at some capacity. So instead, I’m doing this new adventure, scared. Even with worst possible scenarios, they are still manageable. I’m grateful to have an incredible support system that has been enduring my endless ‘what ifs’. Especially my fiancé, Eric. Poor guy has had to convince me to not back out and actually accept the position so many times!

As I wrap up my duties at this position, I’m in awe of the people that I have had the opportunity of sharing a space with. I think of the peer participants I worked with and their experiences of triumph, resiliency, and humanity. Helping participants navigate life has been the most rewarding part of this role. I also enjoyed facilitating the Recovery Coach Academy and connecting with all of CT Department of Mental Health and Addiction Services (DMHAS) Young Adult Services (YAS).

Job Opportunity

If you are interested in filling this position, I would encourage you to check it out here. I hope that the next person to fill this role is ready to meet people where they are at and to fiercely advocate in all areas of this job. USE YOUR LIVED EXPERIENCE – IT’S IMPORTANT! Although it can be intimidating, it’s so needed!!

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